Care for the Caregivers

Alrighty then. Time to roll up the sleeves and get crackin'. It has been far too long since the last post, but I have not disappeared nor intentionally abandoned my duties. As so often happens, by attention has been devoted to some other things —a book, some speaking engagements and a new marriage for starters.

In my last, sad post, I commented that my next one might be about my reactions to what I have been reading in Krista Tippet's book: Einstein's God. (I've added that to my favorites list). That book was inspired by interviews she gave on her syndicated PBS radio talk show, Speaking of Faith. I find it interesting that the name of the show has now been changed to "On being." Anyway, more posts will follow on that journey, but for the moment, I have other fish to fry.

Lately, I've been thinking about a couple of things that come together at interesting touchpoints. My wife's mother has been diagnosed with dementia, and the threads of memory that serve to bind together experiences into sensible wholes are coming undone. It is terrifying to know one is losing one's abilities, but literally losing the ability to make sense of the world and engage it actively is beyond comprehension, yet it happens every day.

The task of caring compassionately for caregivers is something that often fails to appear on our lists of concerns. But their work is unbelievably important for so many reasons, not the least of which is helping to preserve the coherence in the world for their loved ones; while retaining some semblance of a life of their own. I'm looking for that just right project that will provide some assistance for this effort. If you have an idea, please share it with us here.

Happiness is about meeting needs...

Over sixty years ago, a psychologist named Abraham Maslow began working on a theory of motivation. His questions had to do with what makes people do different "things" at different times? His work, of course, led to the much studied, and widely known "hierarchy of needs". An idea behind this early work was that some needs are more compelling than others, and thus serve to influence behavior more strongly. Another idea was that once "lower level" needs were met, higher level needs would take over as influences of behavior.

Maslow's hierarchy was often depicted as a pyramid, with survival needs at the base and higher order needs at the top. The survival needs were physiological and safety related, in that we need to eat, sleep, breathe and be protected from harm. Above the survival needs were the need to be accepted and loved by others, and to be approved and recognized as competent. These needs seem associated with our group-living characteristics—indeed, we are social animals. Together, these needs (survival and social) were referred to by Maslow as deficiency needs, suggesting that actions taken to meet them were inspired by their deficiency. That's why Maslow called them "D-Needs".

At the top of the pyramid, were needs Maslow described as "being needs". Being needs include our quest for aesthetics and cognition, the realization that we have that beauty and art and music enrich our lives, and our need to understand the world as coherent—to organize the universe and understand it as having order and symmetry. At the very top, a motive that Maslow called "self-actualization", people are compelled to realize their potentials.

These ideas of Maslow have now been supported by many studies, and have been debated and refined over the years. Yet, they have fundamental value in steering us toward understanding the kinds of things we can do to meet our universal needs through the things we do.

In coming posts, some examples of need meeting activities will be discussed, and readers will be invited to provide their experiences and ideas about meeting essential needs.